The Language of Money – How Fluent Are You?
A friend of mine, Abbie*, moved to French-speaking Switzerland over a decade ago. She met her husband in the U.S. While he spent much of his teenage years in the U.S., his family was from Switzerland, and they all moved back around the same time. Abbie, however, was like many Americans – fluent in English and English alone. Now she lived in a part of the world where everyone spoke French. She could barely do more than order a ‘café au lait’ at the café.
Photos: Taken by Lauren O’Brien in Switzerland
She tried to learn, enrolling in language courses; yet, she was raising their small children, minding the house, preparing the meals, and – more often than not – she simply relied on her husband to converse on behalf of her and their family needs. This felt easy, and her husband liked taking care of the family this way. ‘One day…’ she kept thinking, in regard to getting herself more equipped than just fumbling through the community she now called home.
In many partnerships, one partner takes the lead and ‘relieves’ the other of the responsibilities in an area of life: laundry, car maintenance, and often money and finances. Yet, money management is like speaking French. You have to practice it, be engaged, learn as you go – there is no other way to continually grow and mature in your money practices.
Photo: Tees Valley Careers
And while it may feel relieving at the time for one spouse to ‘just handle it’, it’s actually leaving you powerless. We live in a world, especially in the U.S., where personal finances matter. Saving for retirement is largely the responsibility of the individual investor. Devising sound spending practices, sending children to college, creating multi-generational wealth – all of these are the responsibility of the individual investor.
If you are not engaged in your own family’s finances, get back your power and step into the conversation. While Abbie did not need to have the goal of becoming a professor of the French language, she definitely should be able to make a new friend at the kids’ playground that she can invite over for a glass of wine.
So maybe start there – with a glass of wine. And your partner, or a trusted friend, or your financial advisor, or just your computer. If you are unsure where to start, here are three ideas:
What and where are your different accounts (bank accounts, investment accounts, retirement accounts, etc.)?
What are two habits you would like to work on with your relationship with money this year?
How much would you like to save this year towards future goals?
Feeling stuck or have a question? Join me for Wine & Wealth at Wine Gallery 108, every first Wednesday of the month from 6-7PM for a safe place to live, laugh and learn money together. If you can make it, RSVP here, or contact me with other questions at lobrien@xmlfg.com. I look forward to connecting!
*Name changed for privacy
This communication is for informational and educational purposes only. No content or reference is intended to be a recommendation for the sale or investment in any product, strategy or service nor should it be perceived as individual advice. Visit xmlfg.com for more information.
