I tend to be a planner and like to have things lined up, planned out, except when it comes to more personal things for myself, then I put them off to focus on things for others, until there is a deadline. It took me months after my divorce to get my documents in order. Are you that way, too? If so, I am going to tell you why you should set a deadline for a medical directive for yourself. Recently I have drafted medical directives for the following:

A single woman who has been divorced for a long time, and whose mother had just passed away. She realized her mother had been her decision maker. After her divorce she would need to select someone new. She had a close friend she trusted, but who was also her age, and she had concerns that as she aged and needed these decisions that person might not have the health to make them, so we added a secondary choice, her niece.

A couple whose son was on life support following a tragic accident in which they had to go to the court to get guardianship for him. He was in his early 20s and it was very unexpected. Having experienced this, they didn’t want anyone to have to go through that process to make decisions for them. They also put in provisions about what type of life support they didn’t want, as they knew what it was like to have a loved one on long-term life support.

A couple in a domestic partnership who didn’t want to get married, but wanted to make sure they could be the deciders for each other in the event of a medical emergency, and could be present with the other in such cases. We take for granted that the person closest to us, may not be actually allowed in the room or to make our decisions, but for the grace of other family. 

All these people were in positions that should something happen to them, the decisions or WHOM they wanted to make that decision would not be a default decision. These situations aren’t uncommon. So many of us are living unmarried, or our partners are older than us, or our decision makers are a trusted friend. We have specific things we want and don’t want for ourselves. This is why it’s important to have a medical directive and lay out in writing what you want, and who you want to make the decisions regarding your healthcare should you not be able to make them for yourself. You can give them the full ability to make any decision you want them to be able to make. 

We don’t know when we may need this document, thank goodness, but that also means you need to have it in place before an event may occur. A caregiver getting a court appointment after the fact is costly and time-consuming, and trying to get estate planning documents done after you have a health issue is incredibly stressful. This includes setting an appointment with an attorney and getting documents drafted which can take time as attorneys tend to be very busy. So do yourself a favor and set a deadline to get your documents taken care of, even if it’s an artificial deadline.

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