Your Must-Read for January
I loved Dr. Fisher’s post last week. If you didn’t read it, then do asap. If you did read it, then read it again. It was that good. The new year is always a time for reflection and forward planning. I love January for all the promise it holds for the year ahead. But I hate the pressures we put on ourselves. Dr. Fisher takes that pressure off our shoulders and allows us to reflect and start our intentions when it’s right for us, not an arbitrary date on the calendar. I have just read the book Atomic Habits by James Clear, and the two really resonated. If you read one book in January, then let it be his. Or you can listen to Brene Brown’s two-part podcast (here and here) where she talked to him about his book. I had three big takeaways that I wanted to share with you today.
My first key takeaway was that building habits isn’t about what you want to accomplish but who you want to be. Clear uses the example of running a marathon. Instead of saying I want to run a marathon, say I want to become a runner. When you identify yourself that way, you can envision what it means to be a runner. And as it becomes a part of your identity, it becomes an easier habit to maintain.
The process of becoming a better version of ourselves does not come overnight. It comes with simple steps that build upon themselves. That leads me to my second takeaway. Start small. If you want to become a runner and you’re starting from scratch, start by simply putting on your sneakers every day. Once that becomes familiar, take a five-minute walk. Then walk a mile. Then run a mile. Then before you know it, you’ve become a runner. Once you identify as a runner, the habit becomes easier to maintain.
Finally, my third takeaway is to find that one thing that motivates you. Dr. Fisher alludes to this in her post too. It’s not about what works for your friend or is the latest trend, but what works for you. Continuing with our running example, you will not find me out running. I don’t like it. Never have and likely never will. (Though I haven’t completely ruled it out.) Running isn’t what motivates me, but walking and hiking do, so that’s where I started.
I can give you an example of how this has played out for me in the last two years, and I hadn’t even realized it until I read the book. As I said, I don’t want to be a runner. Instead, I want to be like Kathy. As many of you know, Kathy is our store manager. She loves the outdoors, loves to hike, loves to move in general. A former athlete, she, at 60-something, can best any one of us in the store. When we go to market, she is ten paces in front of me at all times. She can unpack and shelve Sydney Hale candles faster than anyone. Before the pandemic, she and her husband hiked down into the Grand Canyon and back up. Two years ago, I got winded walking up one flight of stairs. I want to be someone who can hike down into the Grand Canyon. I want to be Kathy. She is my equivalent of running a marathon.
To get to that point, I started by walking the dog on longer and longer walks. She benefits, and so do I. Then I found a friend to take the journey with me, and we started working with a personal trainer once a week. After two years, I’m someone who enjoys working out (which I always hoped I would be but was terribly unsure that I would ever get there,) can get up out of my seat without it hurting, can take the stairs without getting winded, and can pick up heavy boxes without breaking my back. I couldn’t do most of those things in my 30s, let alone 50s.
My journey continues, and this year I’m setting an intention to meditate, which I’ll start by meditating for five minutes every weekday at 8am, in my bedroom. Pick up this book, and you’ll know what I mean!
